So,

March 16, 2005

It looks as though the Teachers’ College thing isn’t happening for me. York doesn’t want me and U of T is probably not too impressed by my bullshit either. I need new goals for the next eleven years of my life.

I should move to Mongolia with a pretty girl and breed yaks; they make good butter.

I should finger cunts more often; I don’t touch people’s privates enough.

I should write a goddamn novel; everyone wants to know about cum stains and yaks.

I should fuck more often on my friends’ couches, cum spewing everywhere in moments of ecstasy.

I should know you in your hour of weakness; I want to please your body and feel your breath on my shoulder.

I should post more naked pictures of myself; nudity is sexy and my belly is full of fire.

I should cut my hair and get a fucking job and a pair of pink underwear.

I should stop being such chickenshit and tell my loves that I love them.

Posted by Tudor at 11:45 PM in Various Positions | TrackBack

Comments

“The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.”
- William A. Ward.

You will be a ‘great’ teacher because you also a ‘great’ person. Don’t give up hope yet Tudor!

Posted by: Katiekat on March 17, 2005 at 12:14 AM

I think you should go to South Korea to teach ESL for a bit. Not only would you be doing something you love, but it will give you time to reflect on who you are and what you want. But, I believe you already have the answer to that!

Posted by: Tick on March 17, 2005 at 12:31 AM


And I quote:
“I should finger cunts more often; I don’t touch people’s privates enough.”

Hey Tudor! What is with the foul language? There are many more nice dirty words to choose from but cunt is a terrible word in my opinion. I thought you were a feminist *sniffle!*

Anyway, sorry to hear about Teacher’s college. I didn’t know you wanted to go!

Posted by: Erica on March 17, 2005 at 01:19 AM

Assertions:
Cunt is a beautiful word. I am a feminist. Ward was right. Rejections are only mailed on April 1st. All words are dirty.

Posted by: Tudor on March 17, 2005 at 01:27 AM

Erica, you must come to the Vagina Monologues - April 5, 7 and 8 in the Turret. The word “cunt” will be reclaimed before your very eyes!

…and I get to rant about public hair! ahaha

Posted by: Jen on March 17, 2005 at 02:07 AM

Everyone needs a pair of pink underwear. A job, meh. Pink underwear, yes.

Posted by: Carly on March 17, 2005 at 05:37 AM

pink undewear is a good idea, love is a good idea, teaching is a good idea, if you want these things, you’ll find a way to get them

erica, cunt is a beautiful word - there is a book called cunt - it will open your eyes to the beauty of the cunt


Posted by: karen on March 17, 2005 at 11:17 AM

Great advice, darling (esp. the pink underwear - I have some you can borrow).

And like I said, it’s all a wash of rejection lately but no worries, there’s a whole alphabet of plans to go through (get excited about making yak butter!) Never give up hope, write a novel about it.

Erica, don’t be afraid of cunt. I use it all the time, cunt cunt cuntiddy cunt, its lovely, its beautiful.

Posted by: Laura on March 17, 2005 at 11:32 AM

I’ll never forget doing the ‘cunt’ monologue from the Vagina Monologues. At the end, I started to chant “CUNT! CUNT! CUNT! CUNT!”…and didn’t stop until it sounded like all 600+ people in the audience were chanting with me.

Try it, you’ll like it.

Posted by: Meghann on March 17, 2005 at 09:43 PM

I would try it, but the chant might come off the wrong way if it’s initiated by a guy rather than a girl.

But I agree — the Cunt monologue is phenomenal (as is an audience of 600+ screaming it together).

Posted by: Tudor on March 17, 2005 at 11:01 PM

Tudor

You should join me once next year in a trip to great United States to drink free booze with the rich kids and then make fun of them.

Posted by: Bernard on March 18, 2005 at 11:50 PM

Tudor,

Shut the fuck up. You haven’t heard from the Teacher’s Colleges yet, so shut your fucking mouth. When April 1st comes, you’ll know whether new plans have to be made, but until then, do the stuff you want to do. Except the fucking on friend’s couches. Nobody fucks on my couch. Sitting in old splooge is double plus not cool.

I sympathize with the fear, but don’t worry just yet. I’m assuming that I getting in, and I’m going to feel no disappointment (because I AM getting accepted). ACCEPTANCES are mailed on April 1st. If a dumb-dumb like me can feel secure in that assumption, a smartaholic like you should feel safe. (“I’m drunk on brain juice!”)

(You don’t have to tell us you love, we already know. :) Though sometimes it’s nice to hear.)

Posted by: Alysia on March 19, 2005 at 12:26 PM

Alysia, I love you! But I have to be realistic — I only applied in two places: York and U of T. York doesn’t want me because they haven’t asked me to come down for an interview (they want people with a lot of high-school experience — which I don’t have). The same is true of U of T.

Next year I’m applying to Windsor! Unless I’m breeding yaks somewhere …

Posted by: Tudor on March 19, 2005 at 12:40 PM
Post a comment






Remember personal info?