Wow, Tudor. Just… wow.

You’ve got to be the coolest, most wonderful person I know.

Hey Tudor,

I think you should seriously rethink that one comment about Dr. Faflak ^^^ (ie. you should delete that from here) I understand your freedom of expression and everything, but he might seriously not appreciate having his name “googled” and having that lovely reference pop-up!!! (currently it’s #4) Also, you have no idea how he would react to such a statement, and if I were him I would be quite offended (not at the pictures, at the comment about him). Considering he will be starting a position at a new school in the fall, I think you should take his perspective on your adoration into consideration (ie. while he may or may not privately appreciate the gesture, he almost certainly would not want it broadcast publicly).

Weird, I would have booted your ass onto the floor

Ikabod, no man who teaches romanticism can fail to appreciate the carnality of drunken minds. But just to satisfy you, I veiled my references to direct gentital stimulation.

Why DIDN’T I boot his ass, and ganglylegs and torso, onto the floor?

Tudor, you encapsulated and structured the evening perfectly. It’s a rare occasion indeed when reading about the event is just as wonderful as the event itself.

THOSE should have been your election posters.

They will be my election posters! My 2005 election campaign will be called “tapestry of flesh: bringing the student body back into focus.” All will be lovely!

The “half-Erect(ion)” Election?

I support Ikabod’s comments, some forethought is required, and I’m glad you ‘tempered’ your original comments. Artistic freedom is great and all, but remember that there are consequences for everything you say.

I can’t imagine being a professor and receiving nude pictures from a student. After cringing, I think I’d report the student immediately to the VP of Academic Affairs and Dean of Students for my own protection, and then to the Director of Counselling Services to have the student counselled. While I wouldn’t exactly call this harassment, it crosses the line of appropriate behavior and reflects a troubled mind crying out for attention.

I agree with fly on the wall. This is a desperate cry for attention for someone who has the inability to love or respect themself or others in any meaningful way. I feel sorry for you because without serious professional help, you will never experience the true joy and happiness of life.

YES, Fly off the Wall, we should all cringe when we see nudity — it’s the most natural reaction. Bodies are meant to be covered, and displaying them (even when you’re trying to do something touching and intimate) indicates a “troubled mind.”

Hahaha! Perhaps I’m not the one in need of counselling, through you should certainly seek help to straighten out your perceptions of the world, fucker. Your incredibly narrow range of “acceptable behaviour” is saddening because it prevents you from developing into a full human being.

And “Yulek,” I think I’m starting to follow your logic here:
Cry for attention == inability to love self

In which case, because you’re crying out for (negative) attention by commenting on my blog, you’re clearly a piece of human excrement unable to experience “true” joy and happiness in life. Again, maybe you should sort out your problems first.

Lastly, I’d just like to suggest that experiencing “true joy and happines in life” is only possible when you’re honest with yourself about yourself. What I’m trying to do is the most honest thing in the world. I didn’t ask anyone’s permission, nor did I ask to be pathologized.

Maybe the two posters above should worry about their own psychosis before they try to help me with mine.

I think Fly’s cringe is not so much about the nudity as the huge potential headache to be caused by recieving inappropriate pictures from a student.

As much as you may consider it narrow, it is a rather accepted norm in the relationship between profs and students that you do NOT exchange naked photos.

Sra, I absolutely agree with you! If Dr. Faflak was not going away at the end of April, and if I still had to be his student in the Fall I certainly would not be doing this!

However, he is going away, which significantly changes our relationship. Now we can see each other face to face, not as student and prof but as people. He is a fucking amazing human being, and that’s why I want to give him a memorable and intimate gift.

My actions are not pathological, but meaningful and deeply felt. I would argue they are also perfectly sensible under the circumstances.

Arg, where is my fly swatter!?

Costache, I like your attiTudor.

Tudaloo,

-NWH

Why does my numeroname link to porn, and kiddie porn at that!?

When the hell did loving your body enough to want others to share in its beauty become NOT loving or respecting yourself? That’s the sign of someone who loves him/herself completely, who isn’t afraid of other people’s reaction (positive and negative) to their beautiful self. Just because you’re a fuckin’ prude doesn’t mean that Tudor should cover himself up. Embrace the liberation that comes from nudity and sharing that. So he’s an exhibitionist. Big fucking deal. What is he hurting? Maybe your sense of propriety, but if you got your head out of your ASS maybe you’d see the majesty of the human form, though not the penis. That shit is ugly.

I would argue with one of Fly’s points in that Faflak still WAS your prof at one point, and as a member of a university, though it may not be ours, he still has to uphold the *shudder* authority of the prof. He would have to report the pictures because he once taught you. This may even bring his new teaching position into jeopardy. I wish it wasn’t so, but it just may be.

Yay, Faflak. Most amazing prof I’ve ever had the pleasure of learning from.

Thank you, sra. My cringe comment had everything to do with the inappropriateness of the photos and nothing to do with revealing the beauty of the human body.

So where does this John Holmes wannabe draw the line? Sending pictures of himself masturbating to the Dean? Thumbnails of himself and his buddy engaged in sex to the President? No matter how he spins it, it’s just improper for a student to send naked photos of himself to a professor, whether he’s in love with him or not. It’s just not acceptable behavior, sorry.

Draw the line, Fly? Why do you keep pulling these alarmist, slippery slope arguments out of your ass? And why do you think lines have to drawn somewhere? You have no right to narrow the realm of possibilities (“acceptable behaviour” indeed), thus making life life dull and meaningless!

For the record, I see no need to draw lines — when I want to do something, I will. Actually, I was going to send naked pictures of myself to the Dean of Students a while back (he asked for them).

And Fly, this is not about “love” — try not to diminish the argument by misreading my statements. Keep being stupid and you’ll be DELETED!

Alysia baby, thanks for the post above. But I don’t think this will be a big deal at all — it shouldn’t be (universities are not supposed to be this stupid).

What I’m trying to do is perfectly open and honest — if the circumstances were different I agree that people might wander. Indeed, I’m trying to get other people to join in on this project. If anyone wants to pose naked one of these days, please let me know — we’ll make a perfectly tasteful calendar for Dr. Faflak if there’s enough interest.

“Keep being stupid and you’ll be DELETED!”

What’s that, a threat?

Keep being stupid and you’ll be EXPELLED.

If you want to send a calendar to Faflak, why don’t you just send photos of yourself and your buddies with your clothes ON? He’s more likely to hang that one on the wall than the one with you naked, which he’ll probably either discard very quickly, or turn over to WLU officials as evidence of your bizarre behaviour.

Stop being so conceited and think about it from HIS perspective.

Oh golly, I wasn’t aware that this was high school.

“Bizarre behaviour” isn’t grounds enough to expell someone, and if it were, rest assured I would put all my energy into having Tudor exonerated. This argument is simliar to the argument about what constitutes “Art”. Nowadays, in most circles this side of the religious right, tasteful naked photos are art. Fine Arts students can submit nude portfolios, even of other students. I don’t see this as any different.

Craig, you beat me to the punch, thank you for bringing that up.

^^^^ Wow, congrats to all the wonderful people I know who chose to responde to fly’s post with words like “fuck” and “pull your head out of your ass”, very mature and also a highly appropriate and effecitive way to make your point heard, *clap clap*

While I agree with most people here that Yulek’s post right after was presumptuous and fairly reactionary and irrational, Fly on the Wall ACTUALLY had a VERY VERY good point.

Tudor, you never even had Faflak as a professor isn’t that correct? Trevor did in first and second year, so stop using the “I want to give an intimite gift to my friend” argument, unless you have some real justification for your actions beside “Trevor thinks he’s (Faflak’s)amazing, therefore he is” I don’t see HOW Dr. Faflak is supposed to recieve these photos with anything but confusion and concern.

True, I supported this idea in it’s planning stages, and I still support the original intention and purpose as it was explained to me. I do not support the way you have hi-jacked this wonderful, personal “gift” and spread it all over the Internet for everyone (including family, friends, co-workers, and EMPLOYERS of Dr. Faflak) to read about and observe. You’re not even being subversive anymore, you’re just screaming ‘look at me’, and I say this mostly because of the way you have been reacting to the honest, concerned criticism posted here. Threatening to delete someone is a GREAT way to open up discourse.

Maybe you never thought in a million years that Faflak would react negatively to your project, but he just might! Especially if word of it gets to him via. a means or person that is not you, and does not support you!!! You must THINK about these things and realize that there COULD be very real consequences to your actions (I hope not, but there COULD). ESPECIALLY considering you are now a WLUSU and Laurier representative.

I’m not trying to stiffle your creativity, but this is a specific situation which you have created by posting these pictures for the world to see and attaching (without permission) Faflak’s name to it. No one made this much comotion about the pictures in the Cord, nor was there much fuss over the “Penis on a Plate” Art.

Perhaps you should step back for a moment and realize why this is DIFFERENT; the last thing I want to see is you getting in academic trouble for this stunt! Feel free now to respond to me with a string of profanity.

Fuck fuck fuck!

All these assumptions Ikabod — I’m quite taken aback. I didn’t feel I had to explain my relationship with Dr. Faflak, but because of your insensitivity I feel I have to.

To put it simply, Dr. Faflak saved my life after Barbara died and I lost my mind. He told me about her suicide on a warm day in September, and I crumbled. He wrote her eulogy, knew about her and me, and his reality was as shattered as mine. I feel deeply responsible for her death, but he didn’t recoil from me — he showed me compassion and humanity when I needed it most.

He gave me a poem, and Blake, and life, and quite honesty I feel the need to give him something in return, something lasting and meaningful. I can think of nothing more meaningful than presenting him with a piece of my naked soul.

I did have him as a prof, for two years in a row, but the thing about Dr. Faflak is that he’s amazing both in the classroom and outside. I owe the man a lot, everything actually, and that’s the reason why I don’t see things as you do.

I didn’t want to have to explain all this (there’s too much shit and fucking misery in the way), but you made me. Now rethink your assumptions.

As for the negative implications of my actions, I trully don’t understand what everybody is worked up about. I don’t think Dr. Faflak will be hurt by this — I think he will understand where I’m coming from, and I think that’s all that matters. Let’s stop inventing boogie men.

And I’m honestly not worried that discipline will be imposed upon me — doing so would be simply stupid. WLUSU and WLU will have to suck my cock countless times before I alter my behaviour to conform to some inhuman standard (“appropriate behaviour” indeed!).

And perhaps my reasons for keeping all this open and know are not as crass as you make them out to be. I simply have nothing to hide, and things would be endlessly more complicated if Trevor and I hid as though our actions were shameful.

As for the threat to delete comments (yes, that was real), if comments get stupid and start making implications about Dr. Faflak, then I would simply delete them. You can say anything you want about me — I don’t care — but if comments get stupid I see no reason to put up with shit from anyone. Take that and suck on it!

Living discourse… but the form… and thus content… is CONTROLLED!

“And I’m honestly not worried that discipline will be imposed upon me — doing so would be simply stupid.”

Again, I think it’s more Faflak people are worried about.

I think that everyone is imagining threats that are not really there. I see no reason to believe my actions would compromise Dr. Faflak’s position in any way. This does not reflect poorly of Dr. Faflak unless you take a hysterical view of things as Ikabod clearly does.

God! Since when did this society become so paralized by fear that we’re completely unable to reach out to one another on a human level? I’m fucking tired of having people misinterpret my actions or worrying that actions might be misinterpreted.

Does anyone else realize how stupid this is, this fear? I just want to do something beautiful, simple. I never asked anyone for permission or advice — if you don’t like what I want to do, too fucking bad.

Sherry, I think you have excellent and very well-thought out points, and I fully agree: The second this gift went world-wide-webbed, it lost a significant amount of its personal value. Defend your openess all you want, I think it devalues the entire escapade and turns a once-personal gift into a pathetically and unecessarily over-interpreted attention-grab.

I don’t understand your threat to censor people either, Tudor. It seems disgustingly hypocritical to censor someone for implying things about Dr. Faflak when your actions by themselves imply that Faflak will enjoy your public gift without any reservations at all.

Tudor, I never forced/”made” you to lay bare all your very personal reasons for respecting Faflak, all you had to say was “Yes, I’ve been in class with him thankyouverymuch, and know him as well as any other student”. However, since you did bring your project and your penis into the public arena I think it is ridiculous of you to get saucy when someone asks that you justify actions that go beyond a simple Hallmark card in appreciation.

If you arn’t worried about the possible consequences this will have for you (and now I’ve moved beyond the pictures as a gift only and I’m talking about that coupled with this blog), then think about Dr. Faflak like Sra said, and what kind of repercussions it could have on him - if not academically, then socially among the faculty.

You might be able to say “fuck ‘em all” without a care, but Dr. Faflak has specific roles and responsibilites that he HAS to conform to (whether he likes it or not). It might be nice if you showed the same kind of understanding or empathy in this situation as he showed you.

Tudor, you’re tired of having people misinterpret your actions, but you have the most creative control over your message, so stop misplacing your frustration. If you really didn’t want people’s advice, you would have eliminated this feedback option, or gone to live in a cave a long time ago.

^^^ Quick nod of thanks to Borrelli, and to Tudor: where exactly is this “clear” evidence of my “hysterical view on things”?

People are only looking out for you and others that they care about and admire. I suggest you learn to take constructive criticism and advice without insulting people, since the reality of the situation is that everyone here (even those you find most reactionary) are tiny specks of concern compared to what is likely to happen if the wider Laurier community gets wind of your Project and this Blog.

“I see no reason to believe my actions would compromise Dr. Faflak’s position in any way.”

Is it tunnel vision, or are you always so deliberately dismissive of the keen insight of your peers?

“God! Since when did this society become so paralized by fear that we’re completely unable to reach out to one another on a human level?”

Oh, please. [Where’s my violin when I need it?] You can reach out and touch someone “on a human level” in ways that don’t involve exhibitionism and conceit.

“I’m fucking tired of having people misinterpret my actions”

Then quit acting in ways that lend themselves to “misinterpretation.” Did you ever think that maybe people are tired of hearing about your penis and your nipples and having to look at them? It always seems to be about you. How far do you think you can push the envelope of defiant self-worship before you alienate every last friend you have?

“Does anyone else realize how stupid this is, this fear? I just want to do something beautiful, simple. I never asked anyone for permission or advice — if you don’t like what I want to do, too fucking bad.”

You seem to have forgotten one little detail. You can’t just do as you please then say “too fucking bad” if you’ve done something that violates the social contract. If you want to live among your peers and reap all the benefits that living in a society brings, then you have to yield on certain things. If you don’t, then just be prepared to face whatever consequences you invite.

I appreciate everyone’s concern, but I just want everybody to stop being so concerned.

Borrelli, who is “pathetically and unecessarily over-interpreting” everything? It sure as fuck ain’t me! I just told a story about dancing naked in Trevor’s kitchen — others (like you) started misreading it immediately. Note that I didn’t ask for advice, but people offered it. If people like you didn’t suffer from debilitating reading disorders (and responded to what I posted), we wouldn’t be having these problems.

Your criticism is as empty as some of the points made above. And what’s this bullshit about misplacing my frustration? It’s people like you who suggest that I should live in a cave and accuse me of being hypocritical that get on my nerves. My frustration is very well placed.

And Ikabod, while you did not ask me to go into details, notice that you dismissed my motives and questioned my sincerity. You shouldn’t get all offended when I become a bit saucy because of it.

As for your hysterical view of things, just look at the last thing you posted. You assume that Dr. Faflak will be persecuted by some anonymous forces for unclear reasons (I’m not sure why he would be persecuted because of this blog or what I do). Do you honestly think people are that petty and misguided?

Let me clarify the situation for you, since we’re losing sight of things:
Trevor and I intend to offer Dr. Faflak a tasteful nude photo of us as a departure gift. This is not a sexual photograph by any means — no erect cocks, no spreading of legs, nothing. There is a huge difference between a nude photo and a sexual one.

I’m not sure I see what the fucking problem is. If you want to carry on this inane conversation, please tell me concretely why this is will negatively impact Dr. Faflak’s life without basing your reasoning on a series of false assumptions (i.e. people will randomly persecute him because of this particular blog entry). (We saw how wrong some assumptions can be, didn’t we Ikabod).

Did you ever think that maybe people are tired of hearing about your penis and your nipples and having to look at them?

Oh, Fly, who the fuck asked you to read my blog? If you don’t like what you read, go elsewhere. I certainly didn’t come into your home and forced you to visit my site.

This is my space fucker, get lost.

^^^ Tudor, I CLEARLY indicated the EXACT “forces” that I feel might have negative reaction to this blog (again, it’s not about the gift, but the blog now … as you have thankfully, FINALLY explained your intentions about THAT for people).

If you bothered to READ what I wrote without being prepared to fly off the handle at any word you might choose to pick out, then you would have seen that my concerns lie within the social and professional network of the English Faculty and/or other faculties at this school and at Western.

Here is the quote: “and what kind of repercussions it could have on him - if not academically, then socially among the faculty.”

While you may scoff at these concerns, you surely must realize that not everyone shares your views (and in fact most people don’t) and THAT’S OK. It does not make them horribly closed-minded or ridiculous. Also, you surely must know that in a professional setting MOST people unfortunately have to act in the best interest of their careers, not in the way that they would if given free-range to do as they pleased (I’m talking about language in class, dress-code, and um.. voting at Senate in favour of Deregulation to ensure your faculty does not recieve cut-backs, come to mind).

I hope all goes smoothly with your plans, but I still think you should delete this blog - or at least block it from google (if that’s even possible) however, I’m sure you disagree. And it’s your ass on the line, not mine.

It seems you would love to be able to control people’s reactions to what you do, and you’ve attempted — apparently with everything you have in your personal arsenal — to do so here, but haven’t succeeded. What’s tragic is that you don’t recognize this failure as an opportunity to change the way you approach conflict. Instead your attitude is: “I can’t accept your criticism, so I’ll verbally abuse you.”

This grandiose sense of self-importance you have does not exempt you from criticism. You can’t get by on a sense of entitlement, or expect people to be automatically compliant with your expectations. Dr. Faflak will not respond favorably to your nude photograph(s). Now you can either accept that, or proceed anyway, and risk the censure that will inevitably come your way (and as ikabod noted above, it will be a lot more serious than what you’ve encountered here).

Some people have to learn the hard way. And then, some people never learn.

I won’t be bothering you anymore.

Tudor,

Again, I don’t understand your misplaced frustration. I never accused you pathetically over-interpreting your [own] blog, if you read my post without the filter of criticism over it you might have picked up that I was making a self-depreciating reference myself and those like me.

Tudor, I’m actually quite shocked at your reaction to umm…people’s reaction. For someone who is so used to “pushing the edges,” you’d think you’d also be able to handle the criticism that comes with it. How can you not grasp the connection between action and consequence? You don’t live in a vacuum (god this sounds familiar), so don’t go posting naked pictures of yourself with text about an eminent faculty member and then act all angry and surprised when someone calls you on it.

I can’t agree with every piece of criticism that’s come through this thing, but I do agree with the simple comment “Pull your head out of your ass.” Have you completely lost yourself in an online persona that you think your actions only exist in a virtual world? Obviously not, but the selective reinforcement you recieve (just because a half-dozen people call you wonderful and ‘transgressive’ or any other of a thousand flaky words, doesn’t mean that everyone else agrees) seems to have reduced your peception of the scope of your actions. Then a few people like Sherry or I come along and try to SUBTLY and GENTLY offer criticism and all you can do is put up a wall? Yes Tudor, you are a fucking hypocrite! You talk about open discourse more than anyone, yet then you try to silence your critics by censorship or suddenly placing territorial limits on your personal space.

The internet doesn’t work that way, social interaction doesn’t work that way, and neither does open discourse. Honestly, I expected so much more from you, but you’ve reduced yourself to the level of your harshest and least enlightened critics. Sure we can stop this ‘inane’ conversation, especially since you’ve deemed it so. Keep the open discourse flowing, Tudor, and I’m glad you’re able to handle some constructive criticism so maturely and productively. There are a lot of things that people have written here that deserve honest consideration, not defensive walls and personal attacks.

Just an observation- no one can pretend to know what Tudor’s relationship with Dr. Faflak is, and no one should take it upon themselves to ‘protect’ Dr. Faflak from a gift that Tudor feels is heartfelt. Who would persecute someone because of a gift that someone else gave them? I’m surprised that no one has brought this up yet. Tudor’s gift is not a reflection of Faflak. Faflak did not approach Tudor with a request for nude photos, so officially, it would be impossible to ‘punish’ him for something he is not involved in. I don’t know of anyone whose reputation can be ruined by receiving an unsolicited gift. What could his co-workers say? “Hey- heard about the calendar you didn’t ask for! You must not be a suitable instructor at a post-secondary institution”. Really.

I don’t pretend to understand a lot of the things Tudor does, but I’m coming to realize that they serve a significant purpose for him, and he’s not forcing anyone along with him, and he’s not forcing anyone to read his explorations and reflections, and it’s no one’s business what a friend gives to another friend. Perhaps Faflak will love the gift, perhaps he won’t, and I really can’t say I care because I can’t pretend to understand Tudor’s and Faflak’s relationship. What I do know is that professors are people who have friends, and friends give each other gifts. As far as I’m concerned, that’s the end of it.

Tudor didn’t write a blog about going to Faflak’s office and giving him nude photos of himself. He didn’t say anything about what Faflak did, and I really don’t think he would. His blog was about himself, and whether or not I get his message, I’m certainly not going to tell him what is and isn’t appropriate to write or not write on HIS blog that I chose to read.

^^^ That is the first intelligent thing posted in this discussion. Thank you!

my concerns lie within the social and professional network of the English Faculty and/or other faculties at this school and at Western

It’s those concerns I cannot take too seriously, Ikabod. People know him as an amazingly articulate, analytical, and intelligent prof with a solid academic reputation. There is nothing in this blog that will detract from that. I’m sure people are intelligent enough to realize that he is not god and has no control over my actions (or anyone else’s). They can only judge him on his own merits, not on information they find on some random site written by some naked guy (on a blog that’s not even about him).

Everybody is very willing to jump the gun here and imagine the worst possible outcome for Dr. Faflak. The thing is, the person who will be most aware of the impact this will have is Dr. Faflak — he can very easily tell Trevor and me “no thank you” when we deliver the gift and that would be the end of that.

I can forsee no institutional punishment being visited on Dr. Faflak because of this, simply because the reasons are not there (these are specific circumstances happening between consenting individuals). We are violating no laws, hurting no one, and people simply object because they imagine some boogieman leaning over their shoulder.

And Borrelli, when the criticizm was valid, I took it — I modified the one line that Sherry thought went too far. When the criticizm is alarmist and downright stupid I have no choice but to dismiss it.

what the fuck.

I have to say one last thing:

You are SO naive.

I think you are the silly one. The assumption that my blog will inevitably destroy someone’s career gives me (and this act of writing) too much credit. Your reasoning is contingent on false assumptions and poorly thought-out conclusions.

I think I heard that somewhere before, Tudor =0)

Hahaha … all credit goes to Tina for pointing out how powerful people think my writing is (we were discussing this earlier and I stole her line).

Ya, so if you do happen to drive to Mexico with Trevor in August, can you make a website about your adventures? :)

I think I’d try to find a way to blog about that as it happens (and include photos & everything else). I’ll still have to work out the technical details (and get used to taking notes on paper & such).

But blogging is key!

Have you never heard of art for art’s sake Fly? I have a friend at Concordia whose art project involves pictures of her Uterus. If she gave these to her prof, would that be inappropriate? I think not. The photos that were taken are very tasteful, very artistic, and least of all sexualised. Though I am not familiar with the relationship between Tudor and this prof, I am sure that so long as the prof is not offended, it will not have to be addressed with anyone else. There is nothing wrong with sharing your art with a favourite prof, spending time with them, being friends with them. We should see our profs as mentors and feel that they will not turn on us and have us expelled for wanting their opinions. Especially with this prof leaving, I don’t see where Tudor is wrong. Why is everyone so fucking uptight? Nudity is awesome, freedom of expression is a right we all have, and prudes are like the fig leaves that attempt to cover Adam and Eve!

Dream, you’re wonderful — you captured the issue perfectly: nudity is awesome! I too fail to see why people object since no harm is done and this is artistic expression.

Thanks :).

Update: Everything went over marvelously; none of the things feared above came true.

i think trevor and tudor, you both are absolutely marvelous, and only the uninhibited, can do what you did that special naked night.
continue to let your subconcious free, it will give you breath one day, when there is no more life to suck.
-Helen